I think by acknowledging my depression it actually helps me feel better. Ever since I blogged about it I have felt like I am starting to feel better. Maybe it is just because I know that spring is right around the corner. Whatever the reason I am happy and feel like doing something! What a great feeling after feeling so blah for the last month!
So my goals for 2011 have already failed. But instead of feeling badly about this I am going to change them so I wont feel bad about how it has gone so far. I think I need to break down my goals into smaller more attainable portions.
My goals on Jan. 4 were:
1. Pray daily morning and night on my knees
2. Attend the temple once a month
3. Start school taking one class this semester
4. Work out 5 times a week
1. So the praying goal is going pretty well. It is already Feb. 10 and I have only messed this one up a few times. But I can do better. It is my goal to have 100% in the month of Feb. and not let my laziness get in the way. When I fail is when I stay up to late and fall asleep on the couch with Scott watching TV. I need to go to bed when I am not extremely tired otherwise my prayers are stupid (not focused, sincere, or meaningful). So my goal this month is to go to bed when I am not to tired and to have meaningful prayers.
2. Attend the temple is going very well. I went to the temple in January and it was a wonderful experience. But I have not put on my calendar for Feb. when I will attend the temple yet. So my goal today is to pick a date and get it on the calendar and call the temple and reserve a spot.
3. School, I have failed at this goal. And don't really feel the desire to do it right now. I thought I did but now I feel differently. The day I was going to go take a test for placement I had a Relief Society emergency and had to cancel my appointment. I wasn't even upset about this. I think this goal may be off the mark for me. I am going to change this goal to something else but I need to ponder and pray about it and see what feels good to me before I choose another goal.
4. I have totally failed at exercising 5 days a week. I think I have gone and exercised twice this year. I have not felt like it (depression) and now I think I need to take this one day at a time. Like today my goal will be not to eat any ice cream or sweets today. I think if I set attainable goals daily for my health I will feel better, I will be able to reach my goal, and I won't feel like such a loser. When I feel like a loser I just go wild with my eating because I already feel bad. So one day at a time. I can get through this day without any sweets! I don't care about tomorrow or 5 days from now, I only care about today!
So there you have it. I am going to be successful today! Pray today morning and night on my knees today! Pick a date to attend the temple this month and call and reserve a spot! Not eat any sweets today! I am a success already!!!!!
I am grateful for the cold, cold days of Minnesota (-8 this morning) they help me appreciate spring. I have never been a fan of spring until I moved to MN.
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